Ellie or Elias, All pronouns. Bisexual. Transmasc. Demiromantic. Age 18. I love musicals. "Throw it back boy queen pussy boss" "A baby trapped in a Milf's body" Matching icons with @meatsouuuuup icon by @natalex-arts
a young child: *tells me basic knowledge*
me: no way!!!!!!!! 00000000000:
I still think about the kindergartener who turned to me at lunch two years ago and exclaimed, “Can I tell you something AMAZING that I can’t BELIEVE? The UNIVERSE is EXPANDING.”
I’m so confused why he would think cookie dough would give him salmonella??? What parent told him this. There’s no chicken in there!
Two words: Raw eggs.
?? What kind of world do you live in where Raw eggs carry salmonella or are in anyway unsafe
Don’t ask me, ask them Americans. I’m an Asian just passing the word on
*deep breath* Though the risk is small, raw eggs can carry samonella.
MORE THREATENINGLY Raw wheat can carry E. Coli. However, if you don’t mind making your own cookie dough, you can easily make it safely.
Take your standard recipe. Omit the eggs. Eggs serve as a binding agent to hold the cookie together. Since we’re eating the dough raw, that’s not needed. Take the flour, put it in a pan and bake it at 350 for 7 minutes. Any E. Coli is now dead.
Just mix the rest of the ingredients together as the recipe is called for and BAM, perfectly safe edible cookie dough.
Thank u so fucking much for this wisdom
wait you’re telling my i can get E, Coli just FROM EATING FLOUR straight from the bag???
Why..why are you eating flour straight from the bag?
Today, one of my second graders was working on shape name recognition, and we got to this picture of a pyramid shape with a wide-ish base. When he saw it, his eyes lit up and he turned to me with a huge grin on his face, pointed at it, and said "When the teacher forgets to assign homework" before bursting out into hysterics, covering his mouth and giggling.
I don't understand what happened except this kid CLEARLY knows about the strong comedic and memeable value of mathematical shapes and emotions that I, an old millennial, cannot comprehend
I did, however, try to recreate this moment as the meme this child must have seen in his head
maybe he was thinking of the dancing triangle meme??
i have seen this gif with that exact caption before. this is absolutely the one he was thinking of
That kid saw one of the simplest geometric shapes and said that's blorbo from my memes 👍
Having autism is like
Having ADHD is like
Having both Autism and ADHD is like
oh look it me
i do im celebrating my dogs birthday
shes turning 2
I’m also celebrating your dogs birthday
celebrating tumblr user heartseeker’s dog’s birthday on the fourth everyone
gnomeantics
punk-a-cat
making up characters is so fun because you can be like “this is johnson he came from my mind” and all your friends will go “yippe!!! horray!!! we love johnson!!!”
very unfortunate but hilarious side effect of calling the example oc johnson in this post is now people are saying this in the tags
we also like OC's called Dick, John Thomas, Willy, Wang, Schlong...
